May 25, 2012

there's a lot of awkward out there.

okay. i sucked last week and didn't do Triple A Friday.
if you don't know what Triple A Friday is, then that makes two of us.
it just sort of happened one week when i had a bunch of crap to write about. the three A's stand for Awkward, Awesome and Are you serious?? because needed to be added. anyways, it's friday and i've got some stuff to say. and i'll be referencing the wedding from a few weeks ago. you know, the wedding which caused me to nearly lose my shiz.

okay. so here it goes.

-my hair length always awkward.
-having a group of strangers (working on a project with garrett) come over without my knowledge that they were even coming over , then enter into my house, dine at my table and then talk about politics (french politics,too, mind you) and religion. i did not know these people. garrett only knew one of them-barely. and yet, there we were. sitting-squished-around our humble dining table like some group of bestie pals and discussing two of the three topics you ought never discuss with people you do not know. and the whole time i was just like ahhh heck- why not start talking about sex, too? at least i'm a bit more savvy in that area and could contribute more than a muppet smile and an occasional head nod. oh, wait. no. i would not have discussed that with them either. because, again-i reiterate. i did not know these people. guys, i don't's hard to understand why crap like this occurs in my life, but my friend Allison and i have determined that it can only be the cosmos pushing me to write a book. what say you?
-doing Zumba for the first time. umm..sometimes it's hard for me to drop it low and not laugh at myself.
-(going back to the wedding) enduring a best man "toast" that was really more of an homage to the relationship between the groom and his best man. there were stories told that probably no one cared about and this best man did, in fact and all reality, sing Bromance to his biffle, the groom. a capella. with a sub-par a capella voice. there just aren't enough words in any language to express how awkward it was.
-(also going back to the wedding) sitting in the temple, looking around and realizing that my mom and i were the only people that weren't family that were at the actual wedding ceremony. oh, hey. welcome to your new eternity with your eternal family. oh, and also i'm there.

-i joke a lot. because that's just how i roll. but it really was awesome to be able to do so much for the wedding. i'm really glad i got to help and that i could make things even just a tiny bit better.
-doing Zumba for the first time. yes, it was unspeakably awkward. but it was fun. and i was burning calories even if i was just hopping and waving my arms around like a stranded island S.O.S-er.
-having a husband that will clean out/fix the vacuum. i tried. but it was like cleaning out  a less cute, less alive, less clean version of gilly. so. much. fur. so yeah, my husband is pretty awesome for doing that.
-watching The Woman in Black with garrett. we rented the movie. we jammied up. we popped popcorn. we screamed like little girls and it was awesome. (no, but seriously. it was really very scary for me. and the ending was and the whole time i was just like EXPECTO PATRONUM, HARRY! but he wouldn't do it.)
-popcorn with m&ms. delicious.
-getting a new maxi dress. it's cute and it's so darn comfortable and it sort of looks like a roll of the gummie life savers. the mixed berry kind.

and if garrett had it his way, i would wear it every day. but that would require me to get dressed every day. is gross and unfashionable.
-teaching my mom everything i learned in cosmetology school so that she can do my hair. she foiled it yesterday and it looks pro.

Are You Serious?:
-my acne this month. i don't even.
-attempting to make Horchata and realizing that i used like 36 dishes to combine 3 ingredients.
-hurting my back AGAIN. this time, it was lifting the baby pool at the dog park to empty it. i'm i 24 or 94? because i forget sometimes.
-hearing the emily osment version of Once Upon a Dream.

hush it, emily. you're cute and all but your pipes do this song no justice and i prefer my disney songs unadulterated. thanks.
-my mom's complete inability to pronounce Horchata. "wahchaka" and "horshoota" are my favorites.
- a woman at the dog park that literally ran everywhere her dog ran in an attempt to keep him safe and well. um, he's a husky. he's not going to get stepped on or anything and i'm fairly certain you're embarrassing the snot out of him when you follow him around the entire park. oh, and another thing-don't get an attitude/yell at my dog for biting your dogs ankles. they're playing. it's what they do. they're canines, not 4 year old girls.

okay. so that's that. i think i probably have more but this is getting quite lengthy and i need to go do something. like stir my flavor-melding horchata. if this recipe is a success, i may or may not be queen of the world.


lyrics: you'll love me at once the way you did once. 


  1. i just want to hang out with you.

  2. Your mom...and Horchata. That kills me! My mom was clueless about what "Cinco de Mayo" was all about/meant. This is what I use my Spanish teach my mother what Cinco de Mayo means. And the past two years since she learned that have been magical!