i'm a people pleaser, an introvert and sort of a total nerd.
my husband is garrett. he really is one of my best friends. i don't just say that because it's what you're supposed to say. he and i were friends long before we were anything else.
he puts up with me because he's sort of a total nerd, too. in a skateboarding, graphic designer sort of way.
i love dogs. especially my own. her name is gilly. she's a rescue. she's a husky shepherd mix. and she has more personality than most people i know. i also love bears. one day i will bottle feed a baby bear and it will complete my life. getting accepted to Hogwarts would also probably complete my life.
i'm a makeup snob. i just love it, okay?
i eat peanut butter on the daily.
i fear getting old. i love thunderstorms.
i really like popping zits. i realize you're judging me now. and i don't even care.
i get music. or it gets me. either way, i love it a lot.
i enjoy working out. usually.
i don't know how to not chip my nail polish off.
my high school life was nothing short of pathetic.
i was never asked to a prom or homecoming or even on a single date.
but i met my husband on my first day of college.
so there's that.
i was diagnosed with chronic depression in 2009.
i take prozac. i'm not ashamed. i'm thankful.
i got married 12 days after turning 22. i felt like the oldest bride ever. but i got over it. because it was a really great day.
i went to cosmetology school. i hated it. it was miserable and emotionally exhausting.
but i love doing hair. (just not my own. as indicated by the fact that it's always messy and i haven't colored it in 2 years.)
i love the olympics, french fries, musicals, most large animals and my religion.
i hate running, those things that grow on potatoes, movie talkers and the fact that mom jeans are coming back in style.
my blog is just my life documented. you won't likely see any fashion posts, any cooking/baking tips or any DIY projects on here. i mean..maybe you will. but don't hold your breath.
in 2007 i moved from my home in georgia across the country to utah (to attend cosmetology school and later BYU).
while in utah, i found myself missing my home terribly and feeling like a lot of life was happening and i was doing nothing to take note of it.
this blog is the love child of those two things.
at the time i began my blogging journey (and the far more challenging than i had expected journey of learning css and html and wtf and blah blah blah) i was in a very strange place.
a lot was changing in my life.
i was changing.
and i was trying to figure out how i was to hold on to who i was and still grow to become something more.
i had a whole lot of life to live, but i was afraid i would lose or forget myself.
at this point in my life, i discovered a song that sort of changed my life. or at least the way i saw my life.
The Song:
The Trapeze Swinger by Iron and Wine.*
it's beautiful. and sometimes it still makes me cry when i listen to it. i won't pretend to understand every lyric. but i know that the first time i heard it, i felt it. i felt like in a lot of ways i was that trapeze swinger.
always in between.
always up in the air.
always reaching for something solid.
always up in the air.
always reaching for something solid.
never certain of what comes next.
afraid that i might fall.
when the time came for me to name my blog, i could only think of this song.
i contemplated "please remember me". after all, it seemed fitting with my situation.
i considered "the trapeze swinger". it would have worked.
but there was another part of the song that spoke to me more. it was a perfect depiction of my life.
not a chorus. not a line.
just two words.
eloquent graffiti.
it just fit.
because really, that's all my writing ( and my life for that matter) is.
it's beautiful and scrambled.
it's raw.
it's heavy and light.
it's my art. it's my therapy.
and i know it's just writing. but it's mine.
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